Off to Tampa with Jeremy Fish for the Tampa Am Contest.
hi dewds. yet another blog of me hanging out with jeremy. my camera broke a while ago so the only stuff i have lately is from his camera that i borrow when i'm with him. he was hired by nike sb to do all the artwork for the annual tampa pro/am contest. in addition, they asked him to do a mural so i went with him to drink beer and search for manatees. our hotel was two blocks from the gallery/tattoo shop (redletter1) so we didn't really do anything until the mural was done.

painting and drinking is so much easier when you have a rad space to hang out in all night.

true story.

this place was half a block from the hotel. alaskan tacos?... who does that? i've never heard of any south american restaurants slinging clubbed baby seal sandwiches. add to that the fact that we were in florida and they were playing indian music inside and you'd think we should have run for the hills like iron maiden... but no, we went for it.

alligator tacos! damn these fuckers were good. kind of chickeny but not too gamey or chewy and they seemed to have just a touch of fishyness to them. they are amphibians, after all. just to recap... we were in florida, eating alaskan designed mexican food made from amphibian while listening to indian music.. oh, and the people that worked there were all goth dewds and chicks. get the fuck out of here. the food was good though.

signing contest posters.

the local newpaper did an article about fish and was sure to let the people know that he was on a mission to see manatees.

aw hell yeah.. manatees!

there's a viewing spot at a power plant called big bend. they pump out warm water which draws those plump, lazy, comfort loving fuckers. it's hard to tell but there were quite a fuckload of them there... at least 50.

i shot a couple of little videos of those fat fucks.

fat breath. i apologize in advance for not getting video of it but i did see at least two mantees fart. i took me a second to realize what i was seeing but right at the base of one of their tail flipper things i saw a slow steady stream of bubbles coming up from each side. at first i thought it may have been air coming up from under the manatee until i saw it a second time. each one came from the same manatee hole landia and lasted about 15 seconds. manatee farts no doubt about it. i will die a happy man (and a half).

manasneeze?

not long after we left tampa, jeff from redletter1, went swimming with some manatees at some river not too far away and sent fish these piks. fuck yeah jeff!

i guess they come right up and hang out with you. sweet damn that is so cool.

it looks like this ones ready for half a hand job (the first half). i don't think it's legal to finish off a manatee on account of them being endangered. i saw a sign at the power plant saying 'up to 5 years in jail for every 100 million sperm cells wasted'.

appearantly tampa electric has taken measures to defend itself against attacks by giving this cuddly land manatee a machine gun and a thigh high, strap on, quick draw ass plug. sweet helmet too by the way, i must have missed his run at the contest. this guy is just too squishy to intimidate anyone. i kinda wanna pet him or give him half a hand job (yeah, the first half).

fish art at the skatepark of tampa.

more. you know that turtle wants to drop in on that bitch.

fugOFF!

nick halkius, woo hoo! he's the nike sb rep for that part of our ameriland and quite a geezer.

jake donnelly is also quite rad. he's a fellow upstate new yorker and recently won slap magazines one in a million contest. he didn't do so good in the contest though. you're still one in a million to me, jake. nice one.

for some unforseen reason, this wasn't any less annoying than the loonies that hold up signs that say jesus is coming back. fugOFF all of you.

aight, i take that back. this annoying ass 'jesus is coming back' fuck nugget even had a mega phone. check out the guy in the background. he was verbalizing everything my brain was thinking while i was filming this dickbag.

show opening. i forgot her name (sara?) but she wrote the artical about fish. she was cool as fack.

me, jim, brandon and jack.

brian owns the skatepark of tampa. way to hold down the sickest contest of the year, dewd. nice one.

me and reese forbes. little know fact, i got into a fight with reese at a dive bar in orange county 10 years ago. we had a mutual friend there and had a conversation for a few minutes (despite the fact that he was wearing full army fatigues.. including the black eye make up) then went about our drinking. not too long later i saw him and when i started to say something he straight pushes me (reese is strong) into a bunch of people and drinks go flying everywhere. a bit bent about the unexpected attack and pissed at the loss of my beverage, i charged him and tackled him to the ground. a bit of a scuffle ensues and i feel someone literally pick me up by the back of my belt and carry me outside (turned out to be a friend who realized that reese could probably choke out a gorilla). i went up and introduced myself by saying 'hey are you reese?', (yeah), 'oh, we got in a fight in orange county in 1998', he remembered right away, apologized, said he was in a weird place then and bought me a drink. i guess the moral of the story is, if you see a guy wearing full army gear at a dive bar, talk to him so he'll fight you then buy you a beer 10 years later. free beer! thanks reese. oh, and that yellow tooth of mine is from a different fight.. with a plastic cup.. at a bowling alley... i lost.

so i went to the am contest but couldn't really see much cause it was crowded. this is the only photo i took there. it's frank gerwy with his pet alligator.

i shot a photo of lightning! before...

after. woo hoo. someone told me this part of florida was called lighting alley.

must be something in the water.

check out the tight ass jeans on this broad! them shits are so tight she's got a crease on her hip. ow dude. fugoff!

i got some video of those jeans in action.

man i wish i had more free time sometimes.

we went to an after party thing for the contest at a bar that appeared to have quite a dress code (or lack of). i asked if i could take a photo of this girls tattoos and she said no so now there's a shitty photo of her crappy bat tattoos on the interweb. in her defense, i wouldn't let some creepy ass dude take photos of my 'tattoos' if i was dressed like that. then again, why would you dress like that if you gave a shit? take both of your guano filled stanky bat caves and fugoff.

this also happened. random drunken patron pole dancing. this girl really handled it.

here's some video of her taking care of it.. with another drunken patron hoping to impale her.

if you're ever in ybor city, tampa, stay at the hilton and get the fuck up for the most epic breakfast ever. thanks luther! oh, and my names rick, not ray.

me in a month.

thanks dewds. fugOFF! {moscomment}

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